i was born with strong visual and auditory memory. That gives me certain advantages in life, but it doesn't help me to overcome everything, and it may even burden me with a few disadvantages. It didn't stop thugs from assaulting me in the bathroom; it did help me to recount everything that was said word-for-word. Part of this was verified by a 9-1-1 tape. now, the problem is that my memory makes it more difficult to get away from some of the unpleasant details. Maybe it's just as bad for anyone else who has experienced something similar. I really don't know. i had an appointment with my shrink yesterday, who suggested that my unusual memory was making things worse. I mentioned to her that on 'House" a person was unable to live a normal life becauase she couldn't forget anything. They eventually diagnosed her with OCD and gave her medicine which deactivated her remarkable memory but allowed her to live a normal life. My shrink said that was scince fiction - pure made-for-Hollywood medicine. He said if i have OCD at all, it's so minor that it's the least of my problems, and it's not the reason i have an unusual memory. My mom has a memory that functions as mine does, and my shrink said she's not noticeably OCD, either.
Speaking of memories and memorization, we're getting within weeks of opening night, and some characters still have not yet committed their lines to memory. I've picked up a few social skills in the last few years. When I was thirteen, if someone hadn't known a line and I knew what it was, I probably would have hollered it out across the stage. Now I either whisper it or somehow cue them in. If they don't learn their lines, I'll end up with far more lines than were ever written for the character of Chava just by saying things to help the others remember their lines. The other characters are appreciative of my subtle ways of helping them. Half the time the director doesn't even know it's happening. It's nice that they like me even though I'm younger than they are.
This is my final weekend with no play rehearsals. Next weekend we have a Saturday rehearsal. The following we have Saturday and Sunday rehearsals. Then it's every day or night no matter what. I'm wondering what possessed me to become involved with this production, but I hope that it will all seem worth it once the actual production begins.