Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Another Rough Night/Ativan /Favorite Songs

Things have gone very well for me lately. It's as though God is smiling down upon me for a change, or the universe just happened to align itself in a way that happens to be to my nemefit. Still, I get these pesky nightmar/flashbacks at the oddest of times, and there's no predicting when one will happen. I shouldn't have had one tonight, but I woken up thinking I was in a smoke filled room and couldn't escape. My head was actually just caught under the top sheet on my bed, but even after I freed myself, I was unable to regain my compusure.

The flashbacks were so vivid this time that Chairman Mao, AKA Dr. Jeff, was called and asked to come in.(I know. How rude of me! How dare I have a flashback or nightmare after 10:00 p.m.and before 7:00 a.m.?) He said he considered phoning Uncle Scott and Aunt Jillian to come to the hospital, but he decided it was unfair to ask them to take care of what he's paid to do. He showed up, looked at me, and said, "Yep. She's having a panic attack, alright." He needed a medical degree and a residency to make that diagnosis, which I myself could've made without benefit of a high school diploma. (I receive that on Friday night.)

Dr. Jeff decided to give Ativan a try instead of Klonopin this time. I just took one about five minutes ago, and we're waiting for it to kick in. He phoned my parents at home and dragged them out of bed (figuratively; he's hundreds of miles away) to have my dad skype with me so he could plat the guitar and sing to me. For awhile, my dad and UnclS scott were taking turns doing that for a few minutes each night before bedtime, but they'd gotten out of the habit because everyone has been so busy. I'm glad the Chairman woke up my dad and not Uncle Scott. I wouldn't have felt right about Scott's and Jillian's sleep being disturbed on my behalf.

My dad is playing and singing a few melow songs. Now my mom is there with him. My dad is in his PJ's, and my mom is wearing her robe. They're singing the song uncle scott usually sings to me, which is James Taylor's "You Can Close Your Eyes." Uncle scot sings it slightly better, but my dad is betterr than Uncle Scott at the guitar parts. Now they've moved on to "American Tune" by Paul Simon. I admit that my parents are better singers than most people's parents are.

Chairman Mao is allowing me to sue my laptop (they're skyping on his because he has a bigger monitor) while the Ativan takes effect. I packed a few minutes ago, as I will fly home tomorrow for my school senior awards assembly tomorrow night, and for graduation rehearsal and graduation on Friday. We have Thursday off from school because it's tradtional that pn the day the other high school that shares our graduation facility has their rehearsal and graduation, the seniors from our school get the day off.

I should use this time semi=productively, so I will list my top ten or fifteen (or however many come up with right now)very favorite songs. (making lists has a calming effect on me; Chairman Mao said it's an OCD thing. I'm leaving instrumentals and classics out. If I tries to make the list again tomorro, the same songs might not appear on the list. It is what it is tonight. Here it goes:

Alexis' Favorite Songs Tonight, Junr 8, in the Wee Hours of the A.M.

15, "God Only Knows' by the Beach Boys

14. "Summer at Highland Falls" by Billy Joel

13. "Bad Day" by Daniel Powter (trite and shallow, but I like it
anyway and the video's radically good)

12 "When I'm Alone" by Nevertheless

11. "Castles in the Air" by Don McLean

10. "Gira Con Me" by Josh Groban

9. "Wild Horses" by Natasha Bedingfield

8. "Mother's Little Helper" by the Kinks

7. "Iris" by Goo Goo Dolls

6. "Taylor the Latte Boy" by Kristen Chenoweth (very popular and
overdone a year or two ago, but I still love it)

5. "Amazed" by Lonestar

4. "American Tune" by Paul Simon (I actually like theConcert in
Central Park version that he performs with Garfunkel best)

3. "100 Years" by Five for Fighting (great song even if it was used
for an insurance commercial)

2. "Blackbird" by the Beatles

1. "House at Pooh Corner" or "Return to Pooh Corner" by Kenny Loggins
(my mom and dad sing it better IMO)

Post your own list in the comments section if you're so inspired.

The Ativan is working, but I'm not knocked out yet, so Chairman Mao is taking me to his house to spend what's left of the night in his guest room or in the extra bed in his daughter's room, depending upon how much stuff his wife has piled on the bed in the guest room because she's in the midst of going through stuff to donate to a charity yard sale. He's driving me to the airport in the morning before work.

Guten Nacht!


1 comment:

  1. Panic attacks are not good. Glad you have people who can help you through them.