Thursday, November 14, 2013

Alec Baldwin's Stalker: A Case Study in Unrequited Lust

I've never been totally, crazily, head over heels in love with anyone. At one point I may have thought I was, but I was wrong. For that reason perhaps I am not in a position to cast judgement on Alec Baldwin's stalker. I can't truly identify with her inability to deal with Alec Baldwin's rejection. On the other hand, such has never gotten in my way before, so why should it stop me now?

Alec Baldwin is not someone I strongly admire. He's amusing enough in the Jack Donaghy role on 30 Rock, but it's easy enough for anyone who regularly employs critical thinking skills to enjoy an entertainer's performance without turning the performer into a role model. There's little in Alec Baldwin's repertoire, other than perhaps his bank account, that I would care to emulate.

Despite any disenchantment I may have toward Alec Baldwin, Genevieve Sabourin -- Baldwin's would-be paramour and the woman convicted of stalking him, among other various and sundry offenses -- makes moderately psychotic people look almost normal by comparison. The only defendant in the trials I've followed in recent years whose courtroom demeanor even approched that of Sabourin was Brian David Mitchell, the evil wingnut who was convicted of kidnapping and raping Elizabeth Smart. Mitchell was dragged out of the courtroon on numerous occasios for loudly (and poorly) singing hymns from among the more bizarre selections found in the LDS hymnal. Considering every known aspect of Mitchell's crazed existence, it is fine company into which Ms. Sabourin has wedged herself.

Talking heads persist in debating whether or not Alex Baldwin ever had sexual relations with Ms. Sabourin. I'm not convinced that it mattered in the least except to the extent that the judge (Sabourin waived her right to a jury trial) might have found his testimony sufficiently lacking in credibility to believe anything that he said. Unfortunately for Sabourin, even had Baldwin, as she alleged, really promised her omelettes every morning for the rest of her life, he's allowed to renege on his promise. People change their minds. Post-orgasmic promises aren't necessarily actionable or enforceable in a court of law. He changed his mind, psycho-bitch from hell! Go back to your mercury! Above all else, go back to Canada [after you get out of jail]. We have enough natural-born certifiable wack jobs to fill our asulums. We don't need sanity-challenged imports.

A person has the right to end a relationship, whether the relationship in question is a one-night stand or a marriage of ten years. If it's a marriage of ten years, of course, there may very well be financial ramifications to obtaining one's freedom, and if children are involved, one has some obligation to them as well. In the end, though, one cannot be bound against his or her will to anyone.

Thank God.

Celebrities and civilians to the world of entertainment alike would do well to be cautious in relationships and to know a person passably well before jointly occupying a bed. Certified nut cases, some of whom possess the ability to pass themselves of as ordinary people walking amongst us, proliferate this planet in abundance. Beware.


  1. "In the end, though, one cannot be bound against his or her will to anyone." Someone should explain this to Bill's ex wife…

    Actually, I kind of did, but she was obviously not aware of it until I sent it to her in writing.

  2. They weren't merely married; they were SEALED. Seriously, as though that makes any difference. Their sealing was dissolved, was it not? Not that I place any faith in it, but I'd hate for her to carry around the idea that she and the Lt. Col. will be together in the next life.