Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Prom is this Weekend

My prom is this weekend. I'm going. I have my dress and shoes. My Aunt Heather is doing my hair and nails because she's just as good as a professional and she doesn't charge me anything. I had to buy a junior bridesmaid dress, but at least it wasn't a flower girl dress. THAt would've been adding insult to injury.

My grandmother, who hates me anyway and already thinks I am doomed to spend eternity in outer darkness with Satan and his minions, wanted me, of all things, to buy a white prom dress that could double as my temple wedding dress in a few years. Helooooo!!!! I'm not even a Mormon. Even if they allowed me to be dunked into theit church, they probably wouldn't let me inside one of their sacred temples for marriage or for any other reason. Beyond that, my mom and dad couldn't attend my wedding if I were wed in a Mormon temple. As angry as I sometimes am at my parents, I would never hold my wedding at a place where my parents weren't allowed. It would have been akin to playing in the Master's if one had an adoptive African-American parent back in the days that blacks were banned from the premises.
In any event, have you ever heard of choosing a prom dress so that it can double as your temple wedding dress? Heaven forbid I might actually grow boobs before I get married.

For the record, my dress and shoes are bright pink -- not hot pink, but neither a pale shade.

I don't plan to be at the prom for hours on end. My date and I will show up about fifteen minutes after it starts and will remain there for between one-and-a-half hours and one-hour-and-forty-five minutes. Afterwards we're returning to my house, along with quite a few other prom attendees. my Pseudore;atives will be there. PseudoAunt is still to sick to be of use, but PsuedoUncle, dad, and mom will split up chaperoning duties.No one will be allowed to leave until his or her parents comes for him or her, or the parent is called and warned that the kid is on his or her way home. I'm not quite sure why parents are so paranoid about prom night. They think we're going to either have alcohol-related auto accidents, get pregnant, or contract the dreaded herps.


  1. Hello dear,
    I followed you here from Mommy Wants Vodka...
    I'm so glad you are going to the prom - and I wish you a lovely evening.
    I realise it must feel awkward with all the chaperoning going on, but yes, us parents are a paranoid lot. Probably because we've experienced things we don't want our loved babies to go through... What, me? Noooo, but a friend of mine told me a story...

    Anyway. Have fun. Be proud. Remember, the Pranksters are rooting for you!

  2. Due to the time zone differences I do not know if you are going to have or, by now, have had, your prom.

    I hope it went well or will go well and that you had far more fun that you could have or will expect.