Thursday, November 24, 2016

Happy Thanksgiving, and along with my greeting, I offer a gift of the world's ugliest baby until my mom makes me take the picture down.

Unless we are or someone close to us is dying, or our lives are falling apart around us for some reason,  we all know what we should be thankful for. I don't have to blather on and on about it for your benefit or for mine. 

For those who have lost someone recently or are perhaps marking the first Thanksgiving without a beloved friend or family member, I offer my heartfelt condolences. (Note the total absence of the sarcasm font here. I say this with sincerity.) 

Meanwhile, I'm trying to find a picture of the world's fattest baby. She's not truly the world's fattest, but she's in the top 5th percentile for her age I'm pretty sure. I've shared her before, so you may remember her. I'll probably have to take her photo down soon, as she's a relative of a relative, and my mom is nervous about my starting off a mega-extended-family feud.



I FOUND her! I thought I was going to have to add the loss of this picture to the list of things for which I am not thankful. My Black Friday tradition is to dwell on things for which I am not thankful, at least for an hour or so. By then, I am sufficiently fortified to be over it and to move on to the merry and bright Christmas spirit stuff. P.S. Wouldn't you think clothing would be a nice addition to this baby?

10 comments:

  1. I LOVE fat babies! My kids had rolls and rolls of thighs. (Very thin now). There is a very small window of acceptable obesity, this cutie is working it! Plus, her mom has a great pic to show her prom date.

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  2. I LOVE fat babies! My kids had rolls and rolls of thighs. (Very thin now). There is a very small window of acceptable obesity, this cutie is working it! Plus, her mom has a great pic to show her prom date.

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    1. Heather
      The picture is about a year old, and the child is already beginning to look human.
      Alexis

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  3. How come your title promises a picture of the world's "ugliest" baby? I don't think that baby is ugly at all.

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    1. Really? You don't think this child is ugly? I think she has a face that looks like the meanest defensive lineman in the NFL. She may grow up to be gorgeous, but she looks a lot like this doll I got when I was about three that my dad named (for some reason my dad thought he had the right to name all my dolls, and I for some reason allowed it to happen) Bub, which was an acronym for butt-ugly baby. I think Bub is still around somewhere at my parents' house. They're operating under the illusion that they will someday have grandchildren who will want to play with our old toys. The next time I am at my parents' home, I will try to dig up Bub, and I will juxtapose the picture of this baby with the one of Bub. Seriously, don't you think this child has a mean-looking face?

      P.S. If I posted newborn preemies, myself included, I would surely find an uglier baby, but this one is the homeliest six-month-old (give or take a month) I've seen in a long time if ever.

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    2. I think she's cute in a "so homely she's cute" fashion, but if you think she's conventionally cute, that's great. I hear that her appearance has changed quite a bit since that picture was taken maybe a year ago.

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  4. My daughter was chubbier than that at 6 months. Like multiple chins, giant cheeks chubby. Rolls everywhere. She was exclusively breastfed. She started thinning out around that point, to the point where the pediatrician was concerned she had fallen off her growth chart but in her words "I mean it's hard to be concerned about her weight if you look at her!" Because she still had lots of rolls. She just went from 99th percentile to 70 something.

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    1. Chubbier than that? For real? I am seriously impressed. One of the worst things a parent can do, though, is to become weight-obsessed where their babies are concerned. You were wise to ride it out.

      I recall reading that Anna Nicole Smith was somewhat watering down her baby girl's formula so she would be a sexy baby. Anna Nicole didn't last long as a mom to little Dannielynn, however the name was spelled, but I wonder if even the brief deprivation of nutrients cost the poor child a few IQ points. No one will ever know, but it could not possibly have been good for the baby.

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    2. Yup her cheeks were especially impressive. W just have big babies in our family. I had oversupply of milk too, so she was probably getting a lot of milk every time she ate. I don't want to post a pic of her but would totally email one if you have a burner email account.
      Watering down formula is scary, babies can die from that if they are young enough. The pediatrician was really funny and always trying to reassure me that it wasn't a big deal but I was like seriously? She is just breastfed, and she is a baby. She is a perfectly normal sized two year old now.

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